im a fighter.

you made my heart, hardcore.

it is amazing how some people can change your lives.
for the better of course, well thats what most people say.
in my case, i wouldnt count it as a typical one.

let me rant about this guy*
he.
he loved me.
but i never understood this.
he stared at other women.
he made me feel ugly.

and now that he is no longer in my life, i am happy.
at last i feel free!
sometimes when i think of him and all the little things that he has done to put a smile on my face,
i only have to think of that one time when he tried to prove *only god knows what*.
and then i realize, i deserve way more than this!

money cant buy love.

i only wanted his* undivided attention, unconditional love and his patience to tolerate.
and now i am happy i dont have him* in my life anymore.

he made me a hardcore fighter.
hell yeah, im numb.

with no intention - 19 january 08

i said i will give up.
and i gave up.
i dont get the whole thing.
its like a bam to my heart,
right across the middle where it beats for you.

so much for the roses

so much for the promises

so much for the REassurance

i gave up

no, i am alive and kicking.

bullshit.

friday morning.

if everyone cared.
nice song.
and if ONLY everyone cared.
nobody cried.
:)

the highlight. - bubu

so bubu has been a part of my life for years now.
at the mo, i cant count the years.
but yes, years.

and so when i was TOO deng lazy to walk to the room to get her,
i'd ask kakak to bring bubu for me.

i never did it better than shouting,
"kakak tolong bawa babi saya, kasih"

so the bahasa isn't all that fantabulous.
but eh, an A2 for spm was not bad at all.
:)

its la la.

i ate an ice cream after i completed my assignment.
its got malaysia, spur, economic growth in it.
dont have to figure.
its done.

i.AM.happy

in order: baileys,tequila shot,frozen mango margarita

i sat in a car boot.
first time. def the last.

oh so much to say.

i touched up my tips. its pink with glitter.
shorter from before and i dont feel 'kaku' typing on the keyboard.

oh so much to say.

i FORGOT i had my midterm media appreciation paper.
i REMEMBERED that i had it at 11 pm the night before.
i studied for 15 mins and was too darn sleepy to continue.

oh so much to say.

i was observing this two men at the local bar.
damn them!
two itchy men who were at the bar but later moved inside to check out a bunch of girls dancing.
the things men do for to please their sick ass pleasure.

oh so much to say.

my third semester is coming to an end.
i cant wait for it to be over.
and yes, im officially done with foudation.

oh so much to say.

i thought prank calls were SO yesterday.
but i got one from this asshole a few days ago.
like how the girls go, "ball-less freak"
this BOY was too damn lame for me to handle.

oh so much to say.

i started reading "the wedding".
err, that was on christmas day.
but i have yet to touch the book.
its been weeks.
i cant find time.
is that a reason?

oh so much to say.

i will never forget last christmas eve.
running around the house in my la senza PJ's.
kor and i doing a treasure hunt for our presents.
and edwin all excited for me to open the presents he got me.
sweet memories.

oh so much to say.

i had friday's for lunch.
i was so full after that, i wish i never ate so much.
i wanted to do the birthday thing but argh, i was too put off.

oh so much to say.

i need to finish two assignments by next week.
and officially my last two.
done with assignments for this semester then.
cant wait. so cant wait. yes i cant wait.

oh so much to say.

there is this damn headphones with no "on/off"
music just plays when i enter any site.
got sick of it.
i plugged them out.
boo hoo to whoever who uses the headphones in my house.

oh so much to say.......... and i just cant tell the rest!

knock knock. who's there? sanity. sanity who? irene's sanity.

so to get my sanity back, i had to meet up with somebody.
thank the lord for he was so kind to let me find two people who was 'layaning' my BULLSHIT!
and checked, my sanity is here, right now, with me.
i am just so full of it.
i make my own drama because my life sucks.
and life sucks so freaking bad that my drama has no one in it.
its me,myself and irene.
i mean i dont know if i was pulling a fast one or what.
crying over nothing?
i dont get it.
maybe the "well" in me was full and it couldnt wait till aunty rose came so it decided to spill some water out.
bla bla BLAH!

so for now, i am fine, really.
and i hope to be for the days to come.
my drama is boring cos i am the only one in it.

oh and the tears on my "window", are drying.
cos i saw the sign! :)

knock knock.
who's there?
sanity.
sanity who?

can you answer my question?

my life.
and there's something thats been going on for almost years now.
that i still dont have answers too.
i mean, it is hard to explain.
i dont know what you call it.
and i dont know what to call it.
it is like this.
it puts a smile on my face when something to do with it happens.
i blush when you catch me red handed.
it doesnt bother me besides that.
i dont seem to care.
so i dont know what to call it.
i dont know whether it has got something to do with passion, commitment, or intimate.
maybe it doesnt fall into this category.
a category no one knows.
and so till today, we know that there is something.
but either one isnt doing anything.
maybe it is best this way.
maybe it takes time.
maybe nothing is meant to happen.
maybe it will happen, i mean something will.
maybe this is just rubbish spilling from my brain.......

disappointing lunch

then the question for today was, "whats for lunch?"
and i got a call during class,".....myself, dad, kor and edwin are already in the car on the way for lunch"
right, the point is, i cant have lunch with them.
fine.

while doing this and that before getting into the car, .....
"pork mee"
yum!
so yeah tapau-ed it, and how can i miss my leong sui.

home i reached and i straight away got the bowl, chopstick and soup spoon.

oh i misseed out on this.
in the car i was taking sips of my leong sui.
and damn there was no taste.

so back at home, i started eating.
and ish, i couldnt get the taste.
was pulling my nose and coughing and the usual scene to get my taste buds back.
i dont know if it is because its chinese food or what la,
but i ate the whole bowl of pork mee - tasteless.
and while eating, this had to happen.
hiccups.
i was hiccup-ing half way before i was done till i finished it.
and so it was sad.
cos after 4 days when i finally am eating something i like, i cant enjoy it.

and then i took my medicines.
damn THE cough mixture!
i got the taste of it and boy did it suck so bad!
poor me.

sick and pathetic.

1 corinthians 13

and it is all about it.

new year eve. bar savanh too, here were all went!

on top of the big time drama that took place,

new year'S eve was a blast off.

and for now, i cant do much of a talking

because i rest my words and

let the pictures speak!

note: ages since i posted pictures. its time i begin.

being kids once again.

they often say - like mother, like daughter.

daddy love and his precious.

my two brothers who will stand by me. oh yes they will.

kor kor love swinging already.

a picture i've always wanted to take.

he loves me, more than i can ever imagine.

we finally celebrated 2008 together.

mummy love and us - sweet.

the Lewis. - third picture taken and daddy love put his hands around his ladies.

these boys i tell you. i love them.

baby love.

one for old time sake - brandon and what he calls me "little sister"

jo rene dee - before the night fell.

2008, HERE IRENE COMES!

back to college

i think college is starting with a big BAM!
presentation,assignment,test.
not the way i would like it to begin but im dealing with it.
there is only one reason why i look forward to college.
no blues clues.
yada yada, college is too soon.